Friday, January 23, 2009

Feelings !!

Feelings !!
Being away on a sabbatical assignment.... has been a great help for me to recoup, invigorate, look at different perspectives, appreciate what others say. Above all, break the ethno-centricity (or call it egocentricity) , that one develops sitting in offices and scribbling office notes. But, unfortunately people ...especially the ones who are vested with decision making have a different version when we use the term invigorate being on a sabbatical , they feel you were in a SPA during your sabbatical and gets a bit biased.

whilst, it was a challenge to get to the field from the desk, shed your official jacket and boots ...then soil your boots...look at issues rather dispassionately ..especially when you are in a development organization dealing with poor households, their needs, hopes and aspirations !!!! sabbtical is a great opportunity to bring the right colour and feel to your office notes...which is otherwise very drab.

But all these learning's and experiences can go for a toss...when you pluck in a promo stage ,....was it all worth it....you end up a looser !!!!...mine is a good case in point.

Attending official interviews during a sabbatical period is a good example of what should not be done, but one does not have options, especially when the dates scheduled for interviews fall during these sabbatical periods. You have awaited all this while.... for such a long peroid ....10 years in my case , I started feeling frail at the edges.

For me getting rejected in a promotional interview in a organization which you have served for 24 years , waited 10 yrs for this opportunity ,while serving it with all humility, day in day out with all earnestness, having obtained three merit certificates, posted numerous suggestions to the parent organisation, participated in n no. of debates, conceived and designed and grounded many pilot projects, contributed and published papers in support of the organization. Campaigned for policy changes externally, in short .......contributed much more than the just the desk work assigned or what was expected. But in the end ...you land in a interview , where you are quizzed which ...gets me down clutched on my knees ....oh god !!!

I am in this world of pain .... I am not sure was it pre-designed ? does these occur in many pvt and public sector undertakings ......any way let me cut the crap ---- why should i cribb after all

Works at NABARD for poor HH / was Research Affiliate at CDS, Tvm / was Visiting Faculty on microFinance for MBA students NMIMS, Mumbai.